THE TABOO OF NOT 
GOING ANYWHERE

Meet the taboo philosopher Carsten Graff for a free 60-minute conversation. You will talk as if it were our last conversation—even though we both expect to have plenty of life ahead of us.

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WHEN THE GOAL GETS IN THE WAY

Most therapy begins with a problem. Something must be understood, healed, changed, or overcome. This can be useful, but the desired result also creates a direction. Once we decide where the conversation should lead, we naturally begin searching for thoughts and answers that can take us there. But what if the problem you are addressing is not the most important area thats nething inside us?

A goal can narrow our attention. It can cause us to repeat familiar stories, defend a particular understanding of ourselves and overlook thoughts, feelings, and contradictions that do not appear relevant to the solution.

Sometimes meaningful development begins only when we stop trying to develop.

 

CONVERSATIONS AT LIFE’S END

When I worked as an undertaker, I sometimes spoke with people who knew that their lives would soon end. I have also had similar conversations outside that work.

When the future becomes less important, conversations change.

There is no longer the same need to arrive somewhere, build a new identity or protect a future image. People may speak about what truly mattered, what they feared, what they loved, what they regretted or what they now understood differently.

The conversation does not need to produce a solution. It becomes an open exploration of consciousness.

This creates a rare kind of freedom.

 

OUR CONVERSATION

For 60 minutes, we will try to enter that freedom without actually having to die.

We will not begin by deciding what you need to change or where the conversation should lead. Instead, we will pay attention to what feels alive between us and follow it with curiosity.

We may encounter love, shame, freedom, desire, regret, loneliness, fear, death, wasted time or something neither of us could have anticipated.

Nothing has to be solved. Nothing has to be healed. Nothing has to be decided.

We can both ask direct questions. You are always free not to answer. I am willing to answer any question you ask me, regardless of the subject.

This is not a traditional relationship between therapist and client. I will not stand outside the conversation and analyse you. It is a mutual encounter in which we are both present, both curious and both willing to be affected by what happens.

The absence of a goal does not make the conversation meaningless. It creates room for meanings that could not have been planned.

 

WHO IS THIS FOR?

This experiment is for people who are able to take responsibility for themselves and are curious about what may emerge in an unusually honest conversation.

It is not intended as treatment, crisis support or a place to receive advice about a specific psychological problem.

You do not need to arrive with a dramatic confession. You only need the willingness to meet another person without hiding entirely behind your usual story.

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PRICE

€0 during the experimental phase.

 

HOW TO APPLY

Send me an email telling me:

• a little about yourself

• why this way of meeting interests you

• what you believe you might bring to the conversation

WHERE

My office in Valby, Copenhagen.